This morning after receiving very sad news from my dearest friend I was numb. Literally, I had no emotion that I could put my finger on. For a few minutes I thought maybe it was shock, which to some degree is true, but I really did not feel. There is a part of me that is ashamed to admit this. But, then as I began to process this lack of emotion I realized that I truly did not know what was the appropriate response to the enormous pain of someone I loved so much and had no way of even beginning to understand. Does that make me a bad friend? I hope not. We say we hurt with someone. And there have been times I have hurt for others. I have never experienced that kind of loss. I have nothing to say, nothing to contribute.
She and I had been discussing just yesterday how things that we perceive as pain are always good for us in God's eyes. Those words are easy to roll off our lips but take years to truly believe, and even longer to live in that truth.
So, I walked outside for fresh breath and instead a fresh perspective is what I found. God has a way of reminding me time and again that just because I don't always understand something certainly does not negate its unfailing truth! As I looked around at birds, trees & flowers trying to hear the heart of my heavenly Father I saw scattered rose petals across my yard. At first I barely noticed, but as I felt the sharpness of the wind I realized they were everywhere. I spun quickly to examine my rose bush I had recently been so proud of with its overflowing blooms. This rose bush had been almost dead last year and I pruned it, cared for it and this spring had been a marvelous payoff. Even my husband, a man mind you, had commented on the number of roses it had produced. My fear was that I would see all of the branches stripped of their color. But instead the dear bush looked no worse for wear. And in addition my entire front yard had been littered with gorgeous red petals. The way you would see the isle preceding a bride, or a romantic bath drawn on Valentine’s Day. And then I saw the lesson as clear as day. In God's economy subtraction sometimes equals addition. What I would have thought would destroy my beautiful rose bush actually added to the beauty all around it. And, even though I would never have chosen to do that to the roses, it sure was a glorious site when God did it. I wonder how many times in my life I have failed to even look for what God may be creating with what I saw as pain? I'm trying Lord. Truly I am trying to see the view from Your thrown, through Your eyes. Please help me Father. Help my dear friend, who I love, to know that you intend to scatter beauty in her life because of her pain.
In Isaiah 61:3 The Lord gives us a sweet picture of this process...
"To console those who mourn in Zion, to give them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; That they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that He may be glorified."
